Dear Reality

Hey Reality,

I just wanted to drop you a note to tell you that you've surprised me recently. I don't know why, because I knew you and I were going to be hanging out a lot this year... I just pictured things differently. For one thing, I thought you would be nicer. Don't take this the wrong way, but sometimes it feels like you're more of a stalker than a friend of mine. You know I don't mind irony and sarcasm every once in a while and I appreciate your honesty and criticism. But do you have to be so brutal? I'm trying here! Can't you see that?

I guess I just hoped you'd give me the benefit of the doubt. That you'd provide me with some tips on how to get a great job. Or that you'd introduce me to some good friends in the area. I know things take time and I'm willing to work at it, but you have to hold up your part of our relationship. I do want to be friends. You're humbling, you're challenging, you're adventurous, and I like that. Honestly.

I want to make this work. Just go easy on me, okay?

I'm still learning...

Amy

10 Places That Mean Something

Okay, so I've done the whole listing off art/entertainment that means something to me, but I've never written a list of places that mean something to me. Since I do have some experience in this area and love to travel whenever I can, I say it's about time. In no particular order, here's the list.

~ The Lower Camera Reading Room in the Bodleian Library; Oxford, England With over 11 million printed items spread throughout nearly 40 different libraries around the area, I was in book lover heaven when I had access to this place for a month. Studying was no problem, though with so much to explore it was quite overwhelming. Sitting by the decorated windows, taking in the smells and sounds of European knowledge was amazing! Being there with new-found friends made it even better.

~ Road between Focus on the Family and MTI; Colorado Springs, Colorado When I first got to the Springs last summer to intern for a month, I was nervous about driving. By the time it was over, the thing I was going to miss most was my morning drive along the curvy mountain roads of this gorgeous state. With the Weepies to keep me company and the ever-changing sky to amaze me, this place was in my thoughts long after I left it.

~ Schloss Heroldeck; Millstatt, Austria A castle built in the early 1900s complete with a tower and gorgeous view of Lake Millstatt. Fill the place with Slovene teenagers and it's by far the coolest place ever for JV English Camps. And I absolutely adore the sparkling green, blue, and purple shingles on its rooftop.

~ First West Olson at Taylor University; Upland, Indiana The saying is true, First West is best (not that I'm at all biassed)! But honestly, 30-40 college girls sharing life with each other is always cool to see. The late night dance parties, the discussions in the hallway, and the nickname shouting from across the wing all served as a fun reminder to me that life is better when you've got company.

~ Josiah Venture's Main Training Center; Malenovice, Czech Republic I've seen this place and JV go through a lot of changes in the past 13 years, but through it all one thing has stayed exactly the same -time with JV always feels like time with family. And that makes Malenovice a home away from home. From having Jacob's hat party, to watching Miss Congeniality in a closet-sized room, to many games of Star Wars mafia, to worshipping God alongside so many people I love, this place holds great memories.

~ Kidsbooks Bookstore; Vancouver, British Columbia I love visiting my relatives in BC and have to agree with my parents when they say if they could live anywhere in Canada they'd want to live there. Vancouver has everything, including beautiful beaches, mountains, and this specialty shop. It's the best children's bookstore I've ever been to and it keeps that Kathleen Kelly dream of owning my own bookstore someday alive.

~ Clapping Circle at Jefferson Pointe; Fort Wayne, Indiana This secret place, sadly no longer there because of a stupid potted tree, was a favorite spot my Freshman year of college. To me it symbolizes the spontaneity and fun of a lot of firsts in life on my own. If you were there, you understand, and if you have no idea what I'm talking about, you missed out.

~ Schoolhouse; Kakolo Village, Zambia Okay, so I've never actually been here, but I feel like I have been. Going to high school at Wheaton Academy taught me a lot that I'll never forget. Maybe the biggest  lesson I learned though is how the least in life should be a part of my daily life as a Christian. The Zambia Project, raising money for this village, showed me the power of giving, compassion, and a life of love. Learning to live sacrificially for the sake of others less fortunate than ourselves and changing the world because of it is a lesson I hope I always remember. And who knows? Maybe someday I'll get to visit in person.

~ Ho'okipa Beach; Maui, Hawaii In my ideal other life, I would totally be a surfer here. I'd drive a yellow jeep, own 15 different swim suits, and hang out with the local beach bums. Yeah, forget dreams of being a celebrity, I would be completely happy living in the sun, sand, and surf of this place. They don't call it paradise for nothing!

~ My House; Carol Stream, Illinois Not everyone is blessed enough to be able to say, "There's no place like home" and actually mean it. However, I am. Through babysitting quite a bit recently I've gotten to see some other family's homes in the area and I am quite certain that mine should be everyone's favorite. The calming colors of the walls, the comfy couches, and of course my mom's hospitality and my dad's jokes make the place great. If you don't believe me, come visit!

And there you have it! What places are on your list?

How I'm Like A Horse

Anyone who knows me knows that I'm not a country girl. I prefer big cities and haven't ever spent much time on a farm. And if you happened to be in my beginning horsemanship class last year at Taylor when Shammy got spooked, you also know that I have personal reasons to dislike horses. Nevertheless, I have recently found myself enjoying the Canadian hit TV show, Heartland. For those of you who have never heard of it, it's a modern family drama about a teenage horse whisperer (named Amy) and her life on a ranch in Alberta. Though I mostly like it for character development purposes, I have to admit it has also piqued my interest in rodeos and the different events that take place at them.

One such event is the colt taming competition.

Basically, each competitor is given a wild colt and has a certain amount of time in a ring to tame it. They are given points for being able to saddle the horse, ride it, lead it over obstacles, etc.

When Amy attempts to tame a horse (which happens a lot in the show), she does so by making the horse run around a ring for as long as it takes before the horse decides to "join up" with her in the middle of the cirlce. Sometimes the horses are pretty stubborn and won't meet her for a while. Instead, they run around in circles, bitter that someone else wants control. Other times the horses will allow Amy to touch them, will meet her eye and sometimes even let her put a saddle on their back, but they throw her off and fight her if she gets too close or dares to try riding because of fear and distrust. It takes a lot of patience and compassion from Amy, but it is clearly a victory when she finally gets a horse to join up and partner with her.

This process fascinates me and I wasn't really sure why until the other night when I opened my Bible to Psalm 32:8-9 and read, "The Lord says, 'I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you. Do not be like a senseless horse or mule that needs a bit and bridle to keep it under control.'" 

Though I'm not considered a "farm girl" in any sense of the term, my recent interest in Heartland, paired with these verses, made me realize that most of the time I am that senseless horse. Amy taming those stubborn, scared animals is a lot like what God wants to do for us. He calls us to "join up" with Him in the middle of the ring. He calls us to a partnership of trust and love where He'll guide us along the best pathway of life... if we let Him. My problem, like the untamed horses, is that I don't always want to give up my control. I want to go the way I want to go -do the things I want to do. And I don't fully believe that anyone could know better than I do how my life should be.

Trusting is difficult, but just as the verse says the alternative is senseless. If you aren't the horse joining up with the Master in the center of the ring, living for the exact purposes you were created for in a harmonious partnership with one who knows better than you, then you're the horse running around the circle, wasting your energy on a life that will get you nowhere, while the kind Master waits patiently for you to come back to Him.

When Following Means Staying

"Where You go, I'll go

Where You stay, I'll stay

When You move, I'll move

I will follow." - Chris Tomlin

Chris Tomlin's latest hit, "I Will Follow" has been in my head for the past few weeks for a lot of reasons.  Besides being played on the radio constantly, the theme stands out as one I know well. As a missionary kid, it just makes sense that I would resonate with the idea of going where Christ goes. After all, my family did move across the world twice for the sake of following God. I'm confident I've seen Him move in the past and that He's called and invited me into a life of stepping out in faith with Him and going wherever He wants me to. But these days, those aren't the lines in this song that really speak to me. Instead, it's the second line above that has gotten me thinking. 

Where You stay, I'll stay.

It's one thing to be the person always leaving -to say goodbye to people and places on your path because you're changing directions. I guess moving is what I'm good at. At an early age I was bit by the travel bug and the effects have been with me ever since. I like the adventure of the unknown road to newer and better things. I want to be called to action and enjoy it when I am.

The part I'm not so used to is staying put.

I've realized recently that it's ten times harder to be content and patient while staying still. Goodbyes are harder when everything has stayed the same, but you're missing someone. I'll just be honest, it's hard not to be the one taking off for a foreign country, a different mission field, or at least a new grad school campus (especially, in this economy). I'd rather be way too busy, than bored like I am here at home. I'd rather be learning in a new place, than admit I might have more to learn here where I'm comfortable. And I'd definitely rather have God tell me something specific to do, than have to be waiting around for His answers to my questions. 

But Chris Tomlin's song has reminded me that my commitment to following Christ means that sometimes I'll be staying where He stays, instead of going anywhere. And you know what? I'm beginning to be okay with that.